Thursday, July 30, 2015

235. Got Money Problems in Your Relationship?


Today my partner and I went shopping for pillows and pillowcases. We found our pillows and then found a really soft, silky pillowcase that we really liked and wanted to get. We saw that the only way to purchase the pillowcase was to get it through as package which included the bed sheet too. However, once we saw the price my partner became iffy/uncertain to get it.

From there what happened was that I went into a reaction because I wanted to get this set/package because how I saw it was that we both really wanted it originally and that we could afford it. However, a flood of reactions came through because my husband wasn't on the same page as me -- he actually was looking at whether it is worth it to buy a pillow set like this at the price it was at.

From this, we both become reactive because we weren't on the same page when it came to purchasing/not purchasing the pillow set. And in our relationship we have that tendency to react easily when it comes to money because we both grew up in different environments and different ways of working with money. For me, for example, coming from a family who would use the credit card a lot and become a little careless about spending whereas my partner's family come from a mindset of saving every penny, and only buying necessities. So, money is certainty an issue and process we are both walking...

However, to get to my point, we were both obviously not on the same page and reactive. What I realized was that this would only continue (us being reactive and not coming to a solution/answer about the pillowcase point) unless we really talk this out and come up with a practical solution. But what I saw was that I could not get to that point of talking to my partner in stability, I knew what I had to do -- I need to apply Self-Forgiveness and release myself of the emotions, otherwise I would end up speaking from/as reactions.

So I took a break from my partner and spoke Self-Forgiveness under my breath. As I spoke I realized I had such a huge desire to get this pillowcase and was angry my partner was not fulfilling this desire to immediately buy it. I was in self-interest, only considering my want and not what would be best for us.  Once I was stable and okay, I went back to my partner and shared with him what I realized. From there on our communication became stable and we were both cool with the decision we made.

So, I'd like to share that when it comes to not being on the same page with your partner and you need to solve a problem, to first apply self-forgiveness on your reactions towards the point and this allows common sense to open up within it and then you can share and work with your partner in finding a practical solution for the both of you. Self-Forgiveness is so cool, give it a shot sometime.


Thanks for reading.



Additional support with communication in relationships:
VIDEO: Communication in Relationships














(Image Source)


 Educational & Supportive Websites:
Journey to Life Blogs:     Personal Journeys of Self-Discovery
Self & Living: Solutions to Personal Every Day Problems
EQAFE.com  Self-Improvement Interviews
DIP Lite:  Free Self-Development Online Course
Desteni I Process: Online Self-Mastery Course at it's Finest

Monday, July 6, 2015

234. What is Guaranteed in Life?

What is guaranteed in life? The last few weeks my partner and I've gone through some situations where we had to question this.

At my partner's work there was a huge change to the system and how things run there, and that recently hired workers who signed their contracts and had faith that they will be working at the company suddenly got dropped and are no longer employed. Can you imagine what that must be like, after telling your wife, family and friends about this job, signing the contract, getting an apartment near work, and then hearing the news that you didn't get it? My partner and I realized we cannot put our entire trust in the system and feel ''safe'' in it because the possibility of getting dropped/fired/laid off, so best to do what we can in the job, learn from it, expand, grow and put some money in savings.

Then I signed a contract for a job and then 2 days later am told that the person I was meant to replace (because they were going to move to another country) decided to stay, BUT that I can work in another area of the school, thus being able to keep my job (whew).

Then we found an ideal apartment, were told to ''take our time to decide'' on it, and then a few days later, on the day when we were going to see it a second time, and started talking about how we are going to decorate the apartment, we got a call that the owner decided to have another couple take the apartment. We had believed we were the only ones involved in the apartment point, had already planned what to do with it, and thus were completely shocked with the sudden turn of events. We now know we cannot be too relaxed about making decisions on apartments since it is competitive where we are living.

So, the point I'd like to bring across is: I've learned I cannot put 100% faith and trust into people and the system because ANYTHING CAN HAPPEN/CHANGE, it can be unpredictable and it can be out of your control. Best thing to do is to stay grounded, don't get your head up in the clouds of your mind, thinking, dreaming, imagining your new life with an apartment, job, etc. Stay real, practical and work with what is here (the system and how things are being run) and do some prevention like have some savings in your bank account just in case you were to suddenly lose your job.

I learned that crying, or freaking out/becoming emotional is absolutely pointless when you're up against the system -- we allowed the system to control us instead of working equal and one with it. For example, those tears are going to do nothing towards you getting another job...you have to go out and get it, or find the people to help you get it.

What CAN be guaranteed in life is the Living Income Guaranteed. I suggest you check it out HERE. 


(Image Source)

 
Educational & Supportive Websites:
Journey to Life Blogs:     Personal Journeys of Self-Discovery
Self & Living: Solutions to Personal Every Day Problems
EQAFE.com  Self-Improvement Interviews
DIP Lite:  Free Self-Development Online Course
Desteni I Process: Online Self-Mastery Course at it's Finest

Monday, June 1, 2015

233. Jealousy - Wants & Desires SCS

Continued from:

When and as I see myself desire to go on luxurious paid trips, I stop and I breathe. I realize it is a desire and thus not practically here in this moment, so I assist and support myself to do some deep breathings and keep myself focus on stabilizing myself in my life and walking my process daily through real time application since I realize that is what really matters/is important now

When I see myself become jealous X through their pictures and reading their words of their adventures, I stop and I breathe. I realize that they are 1% of the 99% of people on this planet able to experience such luxurious/glamorous/exciting situations/events while the majority actually live in less-than-optimal lives and thus wasting energy of jealousy on someone's life is USELESS because it will get me nowhere and does nothing for me except keep me emotional while I instead can use the energy to work on me and my process, so from this -
I commit myself to stop and let go the jealousy energy when I see the positive, nice luxurious and fun life of X and instead practice in keeping me focused and grounded and humble with where I am and what I need to do to keep me stable in my life and my self-relationship, improving who I am as an individual with what I do because I realize the bigger picture that with walking my process I can not only benefit my life but benefit the lives of others

I commit myself to realize only the 1% get chosen/picked through companies and organizations to attend these glamorous/exciting/luxurious events because they fit something the companies/organizations need/want in order to gain profit/attention and thus me getting jealous over someone who attends these events is pointless since such opportunities only fuel profit and the world system as is, where the companies/organizations do not care about you, but only care with what you can give to them to increase profit

When and as I see myself think and believe that I could have been chosen or that ''could have been me,'' attending such glamorous/luxurious/exciting events when I see X at these places, I stop and I breathe. I realize that within me I can identify and see myself as being equally skilled and worthy of attending such events and yet I realize realistically I am not, and even though I really ''want to,'' be at those events such energy on the desire of wanting to be there, and the energy of thinking/believing it could have been me attending those events are pointless and a waste of energy that can instead be used in supporting me in my life and process, so thus --

I commit myself to breathe and shift my focus from being jealous to asking the question ''how can I assist and support myself right now in this moment that will benefit me and my life?''

To be continued...

Educational & Supportive Websites:
Journey to Life Blogs:     Personal Journeys of Self-Discovery
Self & Living: Solutions to Personal Every Day Problems
EQAFE.com  Self-Improvement Interviews
DIP Lite:  Free Self-Development Online Course
Desteni I Process: Online Self-Mastery Course at it's Finest
8Relationship Agreement Course: Empower Yourself, Strengthen your Relationships

Saturday, May 30, 2015

232. Opening Up Jealousy - Part 2 - Wants & Desires


 Continuing from:
231. Opening Up Jealousy - Part 1

''So how to stop nature of competition is to let go of primary self interest of wants, needs, desires and how you would manipulate your world and reality through and as jealousy.'' -The Origin and Nature of Jealousy



I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to desire and want the same opportunities as X, meaning, the fame and the attention that they through their work/online activity
through attending luxurious events and going on paid trips and participating in activities that I find fun and exciting and become jealous of X because I am not able to do or experience what they do

From this, I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to become jealous of X for being how they are, meaning - pretty and thin and attractive where they get opportunities to travel, go abroad and meet new people -- things that I cannot physically be and do and from this I realize that X is only 1% of the people in this world who gets these opportunities, who has these events to attend to, who has the beauty/appearance and skills that gives them these glamorous/exciting/luxurious opportunities that I want but cannot have at the moment

From this I realize that because they are 1% the other 99% of this world live less-than-optimum lives considering the state of this world and the world economic system, that not everyone is able to enjoy and attend exciting/luxurious/glamorous events like X does, and within this I see, realize and understand that getting jealous over X and their travels/attendance to such glamorous/exciting/luxurious events only happens to the 1%, to the select few who get chosen/invited by select companies and organizations from which all of this then contributes to separation and the inequality that exists today where everyone else -- the 99% -- do not get to enjoy and attend these glamorous/luxurious/exciting events because they do not fit with what the company/organizations want/need

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to become angry at X and others who are able to attend free events where they get to eat free delicious food, try on free makeup/clothes at their liking, meet and greet with celebrities, travel to places for free, go to luxurious spas and hotels for free -- basically, people who are able to live and taste the luxurious life because I want to be able to experience such a life but am not at this moment, as well as the majority of human beings in this world, and so from this I realize it is best to just let this go and to realize that  only opportunities come to the select few, the 1% while the other 99% have to work hard and go through much hardships to get by in life, which of course is not fair but this is how the world is and works currently...it is what we have allowed

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to become angry at the thought that ''it could have been me'' being able to explore and experience a luxurious life that I see X does, where they meet with skilled and famous people, travel to different countries free, go to different fancy hotels, where I think and believe that ''could have been me'' if I were able to be in their shoes and do what they do, that I could have the same life as them if I were to change some things in my life, not realizing how they got to where they are now is due to many factors and opportunities that came into their life, many things and points that came together to get to where they are now that I cannot copy or imitate or reenact because it's organic and unique and is what came to them, something which I cannot copy or get because it happened to them in its own unique way

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to react emotionally in anger to the thought ''It's not fair that X gets to do that!'' to the activities and events they get to explore and attend because I want to explore and travel and discover new places and meet new people, desires and wants that I want fulfilled however, with how current reality runs, especially since the money system does not allow everyone to live out and fulfill their dreams, I must come back to earth and remain practical and humble with what I'm doing, to focus more on how I can use my skills and voice to contribute to creating a world best for all, where all would be able to live a life of luxury as the final result, because yes, it is not fair/cool that 1% get to live fun exciting luxurious lives while the 99% live in less-than-optimal conditions and lives

So from this I see that I am reacting emotionally to the reality of inequality/unfairness of certain people being able to experience certain luxurious/glamorous/exciting lives because I know and believe I am just as capable and skilled as them to deserve to go to these places and experience a luxurious/exciting/glamorous life place myself in their shoes. I realize it is only a select few able to taste this kind of life, and if you are picked to attend such an event you are lucky out of the many, you are the ''fortunate'' one. Yet in the end, these events-- do they really matter? Sure you  had fun and it was exciting, but did anything substantial come out of it? We are all going to die someday and face what we've done... so is what I'm doing now going to benefit me and others and that which is best for all? Those are some questions I'm going to ask myself to keep myself within focus and humbleness towards what I'm doing in my life.

Self-Corrective Statements and Commitments to come.

(Image Source)




Educational & Supportive Websites:
Journey to Life Blogs:     Personal Journeys of Self-Discovery
Self & Living: Solutions to Personal Every Day Problems
EQAFE.com  Self-Improvement Interviews
DIP Lite:  Free Self-Development Online Course
Desteni I Process: Online Self-Mastery Course at it's Finest
8Relationship Agreement Course: Empower Yourself, Strengthen your Relationships

Wednesday, May 27, 2015

231. Opening Up Jealousy - Introduction

Note: The series My Relationship with Alcohol is on hold and the point of Jealousy will be focused on for the time being since this is a prominent point that requires to be dealt with.

Jealousy can make one turn into a mean, manipulative person.

There is this woman, who is my age. She is skilled in photography, knowledgeable about the city we both live in, a teacher and has similar characteristics I see in myself. She is successful and very well known and popular, also pretty and thin.  And I find myself extremely jealous of her.

This jealousy started to come when I found myself in competition with her after I launched my travel blog. Because she had her blog before me and developed quite the attention and following, I felt competitive towards her, wanting to be better than her. It got to the point where I couldn't fall asleep cause I kept thinking about her and wanting to find ways to improve my travel blog and be successful. I stayed up for hours developing a plan, becoming an insomniac, completely possessed with a drive to succeed, to be better than her and I knew this was a problem.

I walked Self-Forgiveness, came to realizations and common sense, which cleared a lot of the energy, but that was not enough -- I knew I had to dig more, find out more of myself in this energy and how to direct myself from it --getting to the actual corrections, because the jealousy still kept popping out and it will always pop up until I transcend it.

So I listened to the first recording by the Atlanteans on Jealousy. It was so supportive I was ''blown away'' and many things made sense to me-- why I was so jealous and wanted to direct my reality in a way were I was better and more successful than her. Behind jealousy is actually competition and comparison, and that comes from a history of human civilization that I never knew of but found out in the recording.

From this, I knew that I require to walk the process of jealousy, and what better way than to walk it now and here when the jealousy is fresh and this woman will be a constant in my life (I follow her blog and Instagram) and I am quite sure I will bump into her in the future, so I am also walking this point to become stable and supportive when I am with her or with others who I would be jealous towards.

Okay, so this is an introduction, and I am looking forward to walking this point.



Educational & Supportive Websites:
Journey to Life Blogs:     Personal Journeys of Self-Discovery
Self & Living: Solutions to Personal Every Day Problems
EQAFE.com  Self-Improvement Interviews
DIP Lite:  Free Self-Development Online Course
Desteni I Process: Online Self-Mastery Course at it's Finest
8Relationship Agreement Course: Empower Yourself, Strengthen your Relationships